Babies Dressed As Star Wars Characters

Yesterday, I showed a bunch of adorable baby animal Halloween costumes. I don’t consider these to be Halloween costumes. No. These are just baby clothes. Because I definitely plan on naming my first son Han Solo, my first daughter will be Mon Mothma, and my next kid will be named Leiackbar. S/he will one day be an Admiral, hopefully.

I know Baby Chewie looks a little like he got kicked out of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert, but… no, I got nothing. Baby Chewie just looks like he got kicked out of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert. And turned into a plushie. But let’s not get into that in a discussion of babies.

You know, I am unemployed right now, so if you don’t want to get the whole costume, I’ll make you the wig. In exchange for money.

Rock Band

This is not me playing Rock Band. I would totally take a picture of myself playing Rock Band, except I don’t look nearly as good or cool or like I’m having as much fun as these people. I sit cross-legged on the couch, holding the guitar controller vertically so it looks a little like a sitar, with my mouth open a little so that I get really concerned that I look like a total mouthbreather.

Jigsaw Puzzles

I’ve written to some extent about how I like nerdy stuff. It’s because I love solving puzzles. I’m a big fan of taking a mess and unmessing it, fixing something that’s broken, and just solving problems that other people can’t solve.

Dinosaurs

I know exactly why I love dinosaurs. I, like everyone else born in or after 1982, grew up watching the Land Before Time movies. The first one was my favorite growing up, and I loved when my mom would let me get it from the video store. Like with Golden Girls, Sex and the City, or the judging panel on America’s Next Top Model, there’s a character that everyone can identify with. Are you the sexaholic fifty-something? Congratulations, you’re Blanche (or Samantha)! Are you a hilarious midget? Why, hello Sophia! Are you batshit insane with an affinity for wearing wigs that may or may not be flattering? Looks like you’re a member of Team Tyra. Or Team J. Alexander. You get to choose, you switch hitter, you!

In the Land Before Time, there are five main characters: Littlefoot, earnest, intelligent, he’s the Carrie of the gang; Ducky, the “innocent,” naive, Rose type; Petrie, afraid of lots of things, like Rose in the episode where she had to fly to the Bahamas to give a eulogy; Spike, mute and hungry, is the Sloth of the Land Before Time (no one from any of those shows is ever mute); then there’s Cera. Cera is snobby, rude, full of herself, kind of a bitch, and a total racist. And she has my name! Obviously I was a really big fan. I never play with longnecks either.

Crossword Puzzles

Like most college students, or at least most college students I’ve known, crossword puzzles were a mainstay of my class-going existence. My university had two newspapers, so you had a choice in your free crossword puzzle. I know I had my preference, but at the time, a crossword puzzle was a crossword puzzle. I had no idea that there were different levels of difficulty beyond in got harder Monday to Sunday, that you could usually figure out how hard the puzzle would be based on who published it, or that it really mattered to anyone at all. I just thought that crosswords were to kill time in a boring lecture, while still looking like you were taking notes. My senior year I realized that you really don’t look like you’re taking notes, but I also realized that I didn’t care.

The Scripps National Spelling Bee

I could not tell you when or why I got into spelling bees. They always remind me of my own utter failures at spelling. The highest I ever got in a spelling bee was third place, and it was a team bee. The top three from each class competed against each other in the school spelling bee. I was in fourth grade. I got out (or dinged, in bee-speak) on “bureau.” I still have to spellcheck that one. It’s definitely a mental block for me, because even though I now know how to spell it, I never trust my spelling.

I think the reason I love spelling bees is because I know that I could have done really well if I’d tried. You don’t have to be the smartest, or the strongest, or the coolest to be good at spelling. You don’t have to have special genes that make you taller or shorter or whatever. You just have to be the biggest nerd and the best at remembering trivial details. I am so good at both of those things.